I met Yasser, a Chilean friend in Saint Augustine, Florida in 2021. I shared with him approximately 5 months in a volunteer program. He showed me and insisted on this truth until the day of his farewell: "One is the family into which you were born and another is the family you create." He finally left for Australia where he still lives. He was not the only volunteer, there were several, about 7 of us, from various countries around the world. For a moment we became family. I miss them all together more than apart. At some point they all left.
John Maxwell talks about the 5 spheres of life in one of his books. They are: Family, Friends, Health, Spiritual Life and Work. During life you are always with them juggling, as they do in the circus. Your task as an acrobat is to prevent them from falling and breaking. However, they fall and break on some occasions and the acrobat has to put the pieces together, glue them together and put them back in the air while the others remain in the acrobatics. Of course, when one falls and the others are still in the air, while the pieces are put together and one is patched, there is a greater risk that some other sphere will fall. Therefore, asking for help during those times may be the right thing to do, thus avoiding another breakup or bankruptcy. I say this with full knowledge of the facts. I have broken two spheres at the same time.
Of the 5 spheres only one of them can be repaired without leaving a mark on it, it is Work, it can even be better than before. The rest, it is normal they leave marks of what happened.
All of the above to highlight the importance of the family you create and how important it is to take care of it. This family is usually intertwined with the family you were born into because some members are from both of them. These families are not exactly the same nuclear family, which are the basis of society and allow society to evolve, as parents pass on key learnings to their children, allowing them to be better prepared in the next generation.
The family you create is all the people with whom there is a strong connection that is impossible to deny. Friends from school and university, comrades in battles where there was nothing to compromise but friendship, support and unconditional affection no matter what. Reunions, difficult moments, and spontaneous low-budget parties help to realize that family.
For different reasons I have lived longer away from my family where I was born and, therefore, I have lived very closely the experience family that is created. Also, that family sphere has been broken and I have put it back in the air.
Recently two events related to this topic have motivated me a lot. The first, was my recent 10-day vacation in which I received a visit from my children and my brother with his son (my nephew). The second, is a dinner with friends from Cali, of a more spontaneous than planned nature, held here in Saint Augustine, Florida, where I live today. Both events were in the last month.
From my vacations, I want to share that I have reconnected a lot with my brother, he has become part of the family I create. Meanwhile, something as valuable as that, my two children and his son, between cousins, connected a lot and had a great time, while their parents were also enjoying themselves and trying to take care of them. The result of this is my brother wanting to bring his family to live here. I miss them already and hope to see them again as soon as possible. All of them have already left, however, communication with him is now much more fluid because we have joint projects now where we provide each other with knowledge and good advice.
And there is something really deep about the spontaneous dinner with my friend couple from Cali. He and I graduated from the same school and played volleyball. At school we were more classmates than friends. But this school is cemented experiences and values that make it difficult not to feel connected when we have a classmate nearby. The fact that there is a connection does not mean that there is friendship or strong ties of brotherhood, that is cultivated. In the end, we had a great time at dinner. We shared closer topics and a lot of laughter. They are the closest thing I have to a family here and the feeling is very pleasant.
The family that I am creating today makes me very happy. In just one month two magnanimous events in this regard. My family sphere is up in the air and I'm doing the best I can with all of them together. It is my sphere, cracked, with marks that today makes me smile from deep inside.
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